This day didn't turn out very well either

I spent the early part of the day setting up some crappy lights for the Quixotic event tomorrow. It was pretty sad, but crappy lighting is better than no lighting. I got some help from J, who was annoying me thoroughly by 3. In her constant chattering, she said that the Person of Some Importance was very pleased with her work for the Harry remount. She also said that he said something about if there was another situation like that with a remount that he'd like her to do it. She also said that something was mentioned about her possibly designing something for the Rep in the new stage. All of this speculation is likely untrue, but it makes me furious. I was supposed to do Harry. She only got to do it because I pulled out because of scheduling with another show, which I also pulled out from. That isn't the point. I just want some of the opportuntities. I want something for myself. I want fucking good jobs. I want to work at the Rep. I was hoping to have a position there next year, but SMJ said that he's been told they don't plan to hire any new people next year. I'm feeling very disappointed and unhappy right now. I don't want to spend the rest of this weekend in a tech, I don't want to spend all monday loading in dance, I don't want to go out of town, I don't want to do ANYTHING. Fuck it. I'm going to bed.